I was at a nearby burger place the other day visiting with a friend. My friend has made a real contribution in a number of marriages by addressing a number of issues before marriage with these couples. I appreciate the work he has done.
During the conversation, I asked him, "What have you seen churches do to assist people with marriage that in some way impressed you?" We then had a very good conversation.
I would like to ask you the same question. This may be an event, a class, a sermon series, or it may be something less formal. In fact, this may be something very informal that nevertheless blessed your marriage or the marriages of other people.
Maybe this was an experience in a small church or maybe this was an event in a larger church. Perhaps this was very organized and structured or perhaps this was somewhat loose and unstructured. Regardless of the setting, I am interested in what you or a friend found to be helpful and why.
What do you think?
For me, it’s just hanging out with couples who have strong marriages and observing them relate to one another – seeing what it is that makes their marriage strong: how they look at each other, the tone of voice they use to one another, the things they talk about, laugh about, agree/disagree on. I have told several couples at church, "Your marriage helps my marriage; so I’m depending on you to hold on to each other."
Family Dynamics Dynamic Marriage course blessed our marriage.
Darryl,Very nice. I like what you said and the value of just being present with other married people.
For years we belonged to a small church that had yearly family retreats at the church camp. Our kids got to see their parents play together with other families, study the Bible together, have campfires and sing together and share problems, disappointments. I think this was good for our marriage and kids. I miss those days.
When we were at Hillcrest in Abilene, they began a five-year program to celebrate marriages. Each year, couples who would be celebrating their first anniversary or a multiple of five anniversary that year was invited to be part of a six week class on marriage. The class was half-video and half-witnessing on behalf of couples in the congregation. It was amazing to hear the stories of hardship and triumph or simple dedication from other Christian couples. At the end of the class, one Sunday morning was set aside for all of these couples from the class to together renew their vows. The vows included a portion for the congregation that I had never heard before, a commitment for the congregation to encourage and help hold up these marriages in prayer. Then after the ceremony there was a reception where each couple had a table to display special momentos from their wedding and from their marriage. Gregg and I were in the class the first year; my parents were in it the fifth year. Both ceremonies were special and sweet. It was a beautiful reminder that we’re not in this alone; God is with us and He provides us with a church family to help us hold fast to Him and to each other.
Gail,It is interesting, isn’t it, how something so seemingly ordinary and common as camp can actually serve to impact us in such profound ways.Thanks so much.
Karen,What a wonderful comment! What an excellent idea. I suspect all of you were blessed greatly both in the telling and the hearing of these stories.I think it does all us who are married so much good when we hear the stories of the perseverence and joy of others’ marriages.