Author: Jim Martin

It doesn’t takle a lot of energy. It will be remembered. How about a “Thank You”? It happens far too little in churches and of course in everyday life as well. Someone will quibble about the way someone is doing their work (the work by the way that they volunteered to do). Maybe they are preparing the church wide meal on Wednesday night (and we are upset because they are out of desert!). Maybe drinks aren’t cold enough at the concession stand at Friday night’s football game (the concession stand that is being run by volunteers who have already worked all day in their “day” jobs). What if they do get paid to do their job? Does that mean that they are exempt from needing to hear a word of gratitude?

When we realize that every good thing that we experience is an act of grace we will be more grateful. God is the source of all good things. When we experience these good things through other people, we ought to be grateful. Far too often, we look at their efforts and in many different ways communicate that they just don’t measure up.

Is there someone in your life who really should hear a thank you? Your child’s coach. Your child’s teacher. Your co-worker. Your boss. Your employee. Your very good friend. Your waitress. The helpful person in the grocery store. The custodian. etc. The following recently appeared on Tom Peter’s blog:

What good is a cat? Now I’ve wondered that. (I’ve just offended every cat lover) See the picture above? Yes, that is our cat. Charlotte’s cat. I like dogs myself. I’ve had dogs before. When I was growing up, I brought home a dog on several occasions. Never brought home a cat. My memory of cats is not good. Over on Alhambra Street in Dallas, we once had a big mother cat get into our attic. She wouldn’t come out until she had given birth to a litter of kittens. I can remember lying in bed at night hearing them cry, wondering how we would ever get them out of the attic. Would a dog do that? No.

Anyway, this cat of Charlotte’s apparently likes me. Brother! Don’t you hate it when you’ve made up your mind not to like something and somebody has to mess it up? It could have something to do with me protecting it from getting it’s body torn to pieces by the possums that have made their way into our garage. Or maybe it is because I got rid of that ugly raccoon that was eating its food. (I realize that at this point it probably sounds like we live in the woods!)

I think that it may have something to do with early mornings. I am the first family member that this cat sees every morning. I generally go outside to get the newspaper while it is still dark. As I make my way down the sidewalk leading to the porch, the cat suddenly leaps out from behind a post. Both paws are raised in the air like he is springing into action. This cat does this every morning. The first couple of times that he did it, I thought, “Oh brother, what is with this cat?” Then I realized that this was his strange attempt to play (before the sun is up). I began to pet and stroke this cat. I can’t believe that I began doing that.

Now I have to confess. I like this cat. A cat! I’ll probably never have a dog again who is willing to have me for an owner.

Don’t you hate it when you’ve made up your mind that you’re not going to like someone only to then find that they are actually very likable? That really messes things up. Do you ever find yourself making up your mind a little prematurely about people? Could it be that our minds are so closed at times that we fail to see what others have to offer, even if they are a little “different”?

By the way, I still prefer dogs…

I was talking with a friend the other day about a week long mission trip that he took a few years ago. I gathered from the conversation that he had never been with this particular group of people on such a trip. A woman from their church was driving the van in which he and a number of others were riding. My friend said that as they drove out of their city, the driver turned to the person sitting beside her and asked, “So what is your passion?” He said that one question launched a four hour conversation throughout the van.

I love to be around people who are passionate about something.

School teachers who are passionate about teaching.

People who are passionate to find a cure for a disease.

I really do have a passion! My passion is to see men and women change. Nothing gets me more excited and makes me feel more alive than to see average ordinary people discover Jesus and begin to seriously follow him. That is why I enjoyed Sundays like yesterday.

The guy who was in our assembly who has so many problems and issues in his life and is learning to live in dependence on God.

Several new people at church who are also trying to make new starts spiritually.

I have always had a heart for people who have made some “detours” along the way and now are desperately seeking God. Maybe that is because I identify.

Do you know your passion? Is there something about God and his mission that just causes you to come alive? Is there something about the kingdom of God that really does get you excited?

I really believe that one of the ways that Satan has impacted the church is by convincing us that the things of God are actually pretty boring. When we buy that, the result is deadly. First we lose any sense of a passion for God. Second, we begin to believe that the world offers us real excitement. Third, we become a people who go through the motions while our hearts are elsewhere.

It doesn’t have to be that way…

Do you ever feel anxious? At times, I do. Not as much anymore. It is not a pervasive kind of thing. Nevertheless, there are some days when I feel anxiety. Sometimes it comes in the form of worry. Sometimes it comes in the form of imagination where think about what could happen. Sometimes it comes in the form of an inner restlessness. Sometimes it is like a cloud that appears for a little while and then quickly blows by. At other times it is a lingering dark cloud. No its not any one thing. Sometimes I am thinking about my children. Sometimes I think about the church here. Sometime, I feel this when I am just thinking about my life.

You may become anxious about money. Will we have enough to meet our future needs? What about the kids and college?

You may become anxious about your past. Why did I waste so much of my life? Why did I do such an awful things? Will God really forgive me for doing something so bad? Why have I failed so much?

I don’t know of a quick fix for anxiety. I don’t know of a way to make it disappear completely. I do know that the Lord is near. He is the anchor who I can hold onto. I cannot control what is happening around me. I can’t fix the problems. But I can hold on to the one who is solid. Only with him can I experience absolute security and serenity. So rather than beat ourselves up for feeling anxious, maybe we ought to just realize that we are anxious from time to time. The good news, however, is that anxiety doesn’t have to be forever (Phil. 4:5-7).

Late last night after coming home from the Ranger game, I read a short article in a magazine about a new drug (Provigil) that may promise more energy while you actually get less sleep. I finished the article and thought, “This is great–just what some of us need to hear. A way to sleep less and work more.” (I hope you hear my sarcasm).

I really think that what more of us need is to put a priority on doing what brings about personal refreshment. Too many of us seem to have a lifestyle where we ignore body, mind, soul, emotions and then begin to bear the consequences. I can look back and see a number of periods in my life where I have ignored “self-care” only to have it catch up with me. There are a few things that have been helpful to me in staying alive and fresh.

1. I once heard Gordon MacDonald observe that our waking hours can be divided into three segments (morning, afternoon, and evening). He spoke of how important it is to think of the energy that we are going to be using in these segments and build into the calendar some balance. For instance, if I have a full, intense morning and afternoon, I need to plan my time for something less intense that evening. Or, if I know that the morning and evening are going to be stressful and busy, I need to think about doing something else in the afternoon. To every day, go at life full steam in all three segments is asking for a crash. I found that to be very helpful. So, I try to think about this in terms of how I plan my week. No, it doesn’t work out perfectly every day. I am conscious of it though and try to put some balance into my week. Because of this, I realize just how important my day off really is.

2. Very important to my ongoing refreshment is a daily time to get the center right. Five days a week, early in the morning before everyone else in our house awakens, I read Scripture, part of a book to help prepare my mind, journal and pray. I might read something from Henri Nouwen (The Way of the Heart is a good place to start). Another good work is Jerry Bridges’ I Exalt You O God. I will often start with a book like this to “warm up” my heart. I will then move to Scripture. In the last year, I have read through the Gospel of John, the Psalms, and Isaiah. I am presently reading through the Sermon on the Mount. As I read I highlight words, phrases which really speak to me. (More about journaling in another post)

3. I try to pay attention to my body. I work out about 4-5 days a week. Does it ever help with the stress! You don’t have to work out at a gym. Find what is right for you. (Walk, swim, run, etc) Most of us just need to do something. While sometimes I feel too tired to work out, I also find that it gives me fresh energy. I also try to pay attention to what I eat. I’m not fanatical about it. I still enjoy a burger, Mexican food, and ice cream. But I do try to pay attention to what I eat over the period of a week and go after some sense of balance.

More of this in a later post…

"…Death is universal, everybody dies, but not everyone lives…"  Seventy-two year old, Dr. Ken Cooper (founder of Dallas’ Cooper Clinic) made this observation in an interview with author Bob Buford (Finishing Well).  He goes on to say, "I don’t know how long I’m going to live….It doesn’t make any difference to me.  If I die tomorrow, that’s fine.  I’m ready to go.  But I want to live until that last moment."

He says that one can be "bored sick."  Cooper spoke of a retirement syndrome " …that brings depression, anxieties, frustrations, suicide" etc.

An observation.  For years, I’ve noticed that people will often "shut down" at some point in their lives.  Up until that point, they might live with purpose and direction.  They may even be passionate about some aspect of their lives.  But something happens.  The children all leave home.  The last child marries.  He or she backs away from a very challenging ministry that had captivated them in previous years.  Often this person seems to loose any real passion for life.  You can see the boredom in their eyes.

Maybe this caught my attention because of a conversation that I had the other day while watching our youngest daughter’s volleyball game.  She is a senior and I am very aware that this is a special time–a special never to be repeated again time.  I was visiting with a friend during the game and he asked me, "What are you going to do next year?"  Jamie will be away at college and it will just be Charlotte and I at home.  My answer, "I’m not sure."  I do know that it will be different.

I really like what Ken Cooper’s statement, "I want to live until that last moment."  No matter the age, circumstances, etc., I want to live.  I don’t want to have the boredom glaze in my eyes one day.  I don’t want to coast, being passive and just waiting for something to happen.

I am grateful that the life that we receive through Jesus is not based on what is happening to me externally.  With Jesus, my life is not meaningless or purposeless at any moment.  Nor, is the value of my life dependent on the value that others place on it.

Does a person really have to shut down?  Have you experienced the temptation to do so?  Have you known other people who go through various experiences and stages of life but who always seem to keep their passion for God and for really living?

I told our class the other night about a new book that I am reading by Bob Buford. The book is entitled, Finishing Well. I love the book. Below is a description of the book which may help you to get a feel for it.

Author Bob Buford calls them “pathfinders” — individuals for whom age 40 and beyond has been an opportunity to further their significance rather than to rest on their success. They are people who have pioneered the art of finishing well in these modern times, and who can teach us to do the same, starting today. Buford sought out 60 of these trailblazers — including Peter Drucker, Roger Staubach, Jim Collins, Ken Blanchard and Dallas Willard — and has recorded their lively conversations in these pages so that they can serve as “mentors in print” for all of us.

“Twenty years from now,” Buford writes, “the rules for this second adulthood as a productive season of life may be better known. But for now, we’re out across the frontier breaking new ground.” Buford gives you a chance to sit at the feet of these pioneers and learn from them about Finishing Well so that you may shift into a far more fulfilling life now, no matter your age. A life of significance that will be a legacy for future generation’s too.

I think that one reason that I like the book is that I find that I am enjoying life more than I ever have. Though, I recognize that in a number of ways I am not exactly the person that I used to be. I am very much a “work in progress.” As I think about my life today, I can see several changes that have occurred over the last twenty years.

1. I am far more concerned about pleasing my heavenly Father than pleasing people. Of course, I would like to say that has always been true. But–it just hasn’t. Far too often, I have spent more hours worrying about someone who was upset than whether or not God was pleased.

2. I feel less hesitant to admit my sins, weaknesses, etc. I will not pretend, gloss over, or try to pose as some person who has it all together in every single aspect of life. I don’t!

3. I think that I am more focused on the things that matter. I do not wish to die with my family knowing that my time and energy were being spent on things that really don’t matter in the long run. I want to die “in battle” doing the kingdom business that really counts for something.

4. I feel more passionate than ever about God and his desire for a redemptive relationship with people. That is what Christians and churches should be focused on. When I read of the work of Barton Stone or Thomas or Alexander Campbell, our forefathers in the faith, they were about simplifying things not complicating them. We have done just the opposite. We have managed to complicate the life of the church and its ministry. This has contributed to our lethargy. Let us get back to the vision of Jesus instead of staying bogged down in the mess we’ve made.

I do feel overwhelmed by it all sometimes. Today, I was thinking about the circumstances that seem to surround this feeling. Some of them include:

1. Saying “yes” to too many things, which seem to have little meaning or value. I find that when I am in the middle of things that have little or no connection to my work or my gifts that I often feel overwhelmed and exhausted instead of energized. I recall sitting in a long meeting of some kind a few years ago thinking, “This thing is exhausting me! Why am I here?” It had little or no affect upon my life or work.

2. Sometimes, I feel overwhelmed when my life and work seem to have lost any sense of priority. In other words, there is a “to do” list in some form, but there is no priority to the list. Consequently, it is easy to eat up a lot of time doing things that just don’t matter and then feeling exhausted at the end of the day. Been there!

3. It is easy to feel overwhelmed when I am taking in too much bad news. I feel this way when I am around too many people who are negative and complaining. I feel this way if I watch too much news and read too many stories about who did what to whom. The other day, I was in my car listening to the news on the radio. They began telling some story about some scandal. It hit me, “Why am I listening to this?” I turned it off.

4. Do you ever feel overwhelmed by trying to make life happen? Maybe you have a certain vision of the way things ought to be. Perhaps you are really focused on moving or getting a new car. You put a tremendous amount of pressure on yourself trying to get in place. I was so convicted many years ago, when Charlotte asked me, “When are we (a soft way of saying me) going to enjoy life?” She saw me so focused on the future and wanting this and that. Consequently, I was missing the moment.

5. I sometimes feel overwhelmed when I find myself trying to change people. I know–God is the one who does that, through the Gospel. Yet, I find that I sometimes think that I can do it. “Surely if I did the right thing, this person would finally be happy.” I have spent a lot of time and energy trying to make unhappy people, happy. I am convinced at this point in my life that there are people who actually find great pleasure in their unhappiness. (I know–not all, but there are some people like that).

6. This one is a cousin to the above. Control freaks are easily overwhelmed. Why? They seem to think that if they can just control every detail regarding a situation, that it will turn out well in the end. Consequently, they hover over everyone involved. They are often fearful, anxious, nervous, and then wonder why the people around them tend to have very little joy.

7. I really don’t want to oversimplify this, but I think that I am sometimes overwhelmed because I just don’t trust God with my life (much less my “issues”) It is so much easier to try to manage God than to simply give it up to him.