Bitterness has a way of souring most any situation and most any day. A bitter person can take seemingly innocent remarks and find something devious and sinister. Bitterness is a poison that can be fatal to a marriage.
Withholding information can become a pattern that ultimately destroys a marriage. Some people put great energy into withholding information about those they are texting, what they are saying in private messages on Facebook, and whom they are calling on the phone.
Some husbands and wives will not take the initiative in their marriage. Children cry while he sits in his recliner wondering why she doesn’t deal with them. Meanwhile, she puts more energy into Facebook and commenting on blogs than she does her marriage. Passivity breeds neglect. Consequently, this marriage may suffer from a lack of intention, time, and energy.
Absence of Adoration.
A husband or wife may go to great lengths to do what they want while ignoring their spouse. For example, a husband makes a lot of effort getting tickets to the big game; however, when his wife says that she would like to see a play or musical, he makes little or no effort to respond to her desire. These spouses communicate that they do not value one another enough to make the effort to give what the other might enjoy.
There are people who constantly complain, whine, and gripe about their spouse. They are silent about what their spouse does that is right while they harp on his/her shortcomings. A critical spirit has a way of emerging no matter what the occasion might be.
Repeating Destructive Patterns.
A husband declares that he doesn’t want to be like his own dad, either in his marriage or as a dad to his own children. Perhaps a young mother says that she doesn’t want to be like her faultfinding, complaining mother. Yet, if a person is not intentional about becoming a different kind of spouse or parent, they will often resort to their default in their family of origin. This person repeats the same immature and obnoxious behaviors disliked in his/her father or mother.
These are six deadly enemies of marriage. Anyone who is married and follows Jesus has been called to something higher. Genuine self-giving love will cause us to avoid these enemies and not go near them.
Is there a particular enemy that you have had to be especially attentive to?